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Jonathan Burton's avatar

My version of this is thinking "hey, I could read in the bath! Warm, relaxing, quiet..." Then after 5 minutes of being in the bath it's uncomfortable and cold. So I think "why I am I wet and cold, I could be lying on the bed reading!" I get out of the bath, dried, dressed, lie on the bed. After 5 minutes, it's not comfortable reading a heavy book on your back, or even perched up. I think "hey, I could just be sitting on the sofa reading this." I go downstairs, sit on the sofa and start reading. Then I look up, see the TV and think... I wonder what's on. From reading a work of great literature to watching Nothing to Declare in about 20 minutes.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

I could not relate to this more

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Julie Ma's avatar

Although I find that if you need to top up the bath with more hot water, it's the sign of a good read?

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Leslie's avatar

Like you, I once sat on the floor in the National Theatre lobby and a woman who didn't work there got so mad at me that I still think about it sometimes, even though it was maybe fifteen years ago. Knowing that it happened to you too has now healed me a little bit?

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Stevie Martin's avatar

yes it might have been 15 years ago for me too actually - we may have been doing it at the same time! Fuck them!!

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Ian Winter's avatar

A very posh hotel lobby is your half-way house. Big comfiness, fewer loud conversations, prizeworthy people-watching intermissions.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

Oooooooh

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Bethany P.'s avatar

I dare you to sit for five minutes in the lobby of a hotel you’re not staying in. Because I absolutely could not.

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Eva Lydon 🌺's avatar

Love this and wholeheartedly agree with everything! 🤣 Particularly about needing a third arm when “wielding a hardback” 😆 Oh yay.. you’re touring! Oooo, consider two tickets sold... now, who to go with, it won’t be my partner because it turns out he’s a bit of a twat and actually should probably break up with him soon. Wow, that just came out.. sorry!

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Stevie Martin's avatar

firstly thank you! And secondly, solidarity re the twat!! Sending love and twatless vibes xx

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Julia Spinola's avatar

reading on the bus!! if you get a good seat and settle in to a good 30+ minute bus ride it's perfect. I will always take a longer bus over a shorter tube to sneak in this time

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Mike Riley 🌴's avatar

I’ve never seen anyone reading in a Ramen Bar but applaud your effort. Ok I’ve never been to one but even so. Pardon me now while I Google nipple cream.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

I’m being pretentious actually, it was just a chain noodle place called tonkotsu - but v brothy and splashy!!

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Watch The Guitar's avatar

Going to strongly agree actually. When I’m not at home and have to go somewhere for a lunch hour and want to read my first choice is always the park. The only cafe I used to like sitting in was one near Oxford Street run by Italians where a waiter would out of nowhere burst out a bit of opera. I enjoyed how everyone was made uncomfortable by it.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

OH park reading! I haven’t done much park reading lately so will try it out and give it a full review later in the year. also this cafe sounds exceptional

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Watch The Guitar's avatar

Was early nineties so bound not to exist now sadly.

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Deepti's avatar

Agree with your take..between the choices to eat, people watch, avoid spilling and juggling the book, home is a much better option

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The Stain's avatar

(this was hilarious x) as someone who Has to read on their lunch break every day or they’ll go insane, the meta for me is the downstairs lobby of an office building that has chairs in it, unless it’s nice out, when i’ll find some sort of perch in the sun where it’s quiet and relaxing outside (i work by the sea so this is unreasonably easy for me)

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Zoe Paskett's avatar

I was on my way to read my book in a cafe when this popped up on my phone, so I decided to get a pastel de nata and eat it in the park instead. I could have read my book in the park I guess, but then I would have got custard on the book and I decided I'd rather have all the custard in my mouth. Thanks for unknowingly pushing me toward the pastel de nata

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Stevie Martin's avatar

You are so welcome. God I love pastel de nata

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Andy's avatar

I can't read books in a cafe as there's too many distractions and people watching is a major distraction too! Best place is the comfort of your own home. Especially if your book is embarrassingly titled!!

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kets99's avatar

this was DELIGHTFUL to read Stevie!

also, same same same! I always try to read for 5 mins and then hop on to another activity

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Sian Meades-Williams's avatar

Spent a good chunk of this morning being excited about going to read in a cafe after I've finished my work.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

please report back

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Sian Meades-Williams's avatar

First cafe was closed (can't take you seriously if you close at 3?!), second cafe was full, stuck in a new third cafe quite far from my house drinking awful coffee. 0/10.

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carys's avatar

I always romanticise reading on a train which is so hit or miss: sometimes its quiet and idyllic, getting lost in a story then glancing up to gorgeous British countryside- but then sometimes a load of footie lads will pile on and the ideal is ruined. I reckon waterstones cafes are the best place to read as usually a lot of people are doing the same thing but then my god ive noticed the sound of coffee machines is so infuriating!

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Andy MacKenzie's avatar

Just recently a friend died in my arms, and trying to desperately take his mind off things I asked him what he plans to do when he gets better. Without hesitation he said, "I've always wanted to read the complete works of Shakespeare in a London cafe! If I don't make it Andy, please do it for me." Stevie, you're not helping me here!

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Val (she/her)'s avatar

The trick's an e-reader -- you only need the one hand to swipe. Otherwise I've just made peace with eating agonisingly slowly following a one mouthful/one page rhythm. Regrettably that does nothing for noise, soupçon or not, and sometimes there's nothing to do but give in and eavesdrop (and hope they have more to say than simply announcing which shops they'll hit for groceries)

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