43 Comments
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Lewis Holmes's avatar

Kimchi from the jar should be a universal right, like air and water.

Black t-shirts for life. Avoiding the suns rays like Big Drac. Forever sitting in the shade. I didn't choose the goth life, it chose me.

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strangecomforts's avatar

Tye-dye it, it has to be done.

This is what I don’t get about the chef’s pristine white t-shirts in ‘The Bear’, he would be 100% covered in sauce all day long

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Vaila black's avatar

I have never ever in my life managed to wear anything white.. ever - I atrract stains and dirt like the anti vanish stain attracting human I am.

I once met a lady who had a child and was wearing all white - I think she was some sortof earthly being...

I get dirty with black clothes on.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

I feel very seen and also calmed that I’m not the only one

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L.'s avatar

Total nonsequitur to this piece BUT I became familiar with you because of Taskmaster. I always wondered how I'd do if I was on the show. Then I listened to your interview on the Taskmaster podcast. I discovered very quickly that I would be you. The problems you talked about with processing, specifically how your brain wasn't making connections, is what I've dealt with my entire life. You said so many things during that podcast where I went, "No way! Someone else does that?!" Thank you for representing the different thinkers so well on Taskmaster. (That is actually a sincere comment. Your humanity was awesome.) I hope you see this post and I hope you don't hate it. Keep doing what you do! I look forward to seeing you in your next projects! Also, I'm a member of the massive head club. I have owned t-shirts where my head could barely fit through the head-hole. That's so disappointing.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

Oh this is so lovely! I think it’s so much more common than we think - I’m glad you think the same as me!! Yeah it’s really nice to do things where your different thinking brain is an asset rather than an issue. And so hard to do things that cause brain friction (DRIVING)

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Sophie Hall's avatar

Preach Stevie! And thoughts & prayers to the late ear-fly.

Wash ANY white piece of clothing (it doesn't matter how much Vanish or Bicarb of Soda you're rocking) - it will, in the words of Mel C ft. Lisa Left Eye Lopez (RIP) Never Be The Same Again.

So many slightly greyish socks. So little time. Thank you for raising awareness of this important topic

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Stevie Martin's avatar

Excellent song god I’d forgotten about it! A total banger.

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Becky Urquhart's avatar

But linen needs ironing and then ironing and then ironing again before you can wear it. Then the minute after you've put it on it looks like you didn't iron it 3 times before you put it on!

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Stevie Martin's avatar

I had a whole bit about ironing in this and cut it cos it felt like a tangent but YES OMG. Spent half an hour steaming the coords so they looked merely “quite creased”. Then when I sat on the train they creased more. Clothes in general can do one

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Elaine R. Frieman's avatar

Beetroot as a snack! And the fly! 🙈🤣🫶🏻

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Lucy's avatar

another white t shirt mistake I made was wearing one to Chessington theme park and then accidentally going on a ride where I got drenched. I did not know the ride included water (it was just some swinging chairs) and then I felt embarrassed for the rest of my day cause I didn't have a jumper 🫠

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Ruth Sedar's avatar

I bought a white top. It's been in the drawer for about 4 weeks and I will safely wear it NEVER because I cannot be trusted

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Ruth Sedar's avatar

The white top in my profile picture is photoshopped. Not even kidding.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

This is amazing hahahaha thank you for sharing your truth

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Deirdre's avatar

😂

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Deirdre's avatar

😂

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Anna Morrogh's avatar

Having also never rocked a white tee without some kind of mishap I cannot begin to fathom why white jeans exist

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Stevie Martin's avatar

My brain can’t fathom white trousers. It’s got to be purely rich people who wear it for like two minutes or get transported everywhere surely surely

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Kodiak's avatar

Quite. Dinner medals are proudly displayed upon white t-shirts, showing service towards mucky eating and general slovenlyness.

You must also stay away from garden sprinklers and water balloons, for else you will look rude.

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Elsie Morales's avatar

My uniform is a white tee and jeans and I felt this post in my soul. Even if I manage to keep my food and coffee off of the damn shirt (I carry Tide pens in my bag now) my sunscreen will make eventually make my collar yellow :-/

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Leigh Mann's avatar

Dr. Bronner’s (or maybe any?) castile soap is a fantastic gentle stain remover - especially in bathtubs and sinks (coat it and leave it overnight, then wet, scrub, and rinse - magic). Dab it on when you take off the garment and leave it til you do laundry again.

You have detailed exactly why I never wear white. They made my hospital’s Pride shirt white last year and I dared to wear it to the office this week - instant regret! 5 stains by 10AM!

I don’t typically wear black either / my closet is a lovely rainbow of the “Soft Summer” palette. So many lovely colors and fun combinations… and no glaring stains. 🤩🌈👩🏻‍🎤

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Elisabeth Hill's avatar

I wouldn’t normally consider myself a messy person, but I do think that every white tee shirt is actually cursed.

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Pip's avatar

I recently successfully got a dried-in bloodstain out of a white cushion cover (thanks to a YouTube video), so -feeling invincible - offered to get a brown stain out of the wifebeater vest the 19 year old has taken to wearing. He refused on the grounds that stains were 'part of the look'. Fair play.

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micah's avatar

I'm not sure of any environmentally friendly way to get nasty stains out of white t's. Either sucks for the environment or sucks at it's job. Best bet? Shred the shirt, toss it in an air fryer with a teaspoon of oil, eat as if they are chips and dip them in whatever the worst of the stains are from.

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Stevie Martin's avatar

Someone has suggested soda crystals and I will be looking into this..

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KL's avatar

You need Kiss-off stain stick. In the US they sell it at art supply stores. You can just use it for spot washing without laundering the whole shirt. Also, use super hot water for food stains, the hotter the better.

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